What are Narcissist Breadcrumbs? (& Why do they throw it?)
What are Narcissist Breadcrumbs? What is breadcrumbing in a relationship? Breadcrumbing is a term usually related to dating which is also usually considered toxic behavior. Yet many people tend to use the technique of breadcrumb while already being committed, especially narcissists.
Before proceeding to know more about Narcissist Breadcrumbs, let us know a little more in detail about throwing breadcrumbs to someone in terms of the dating language. What does it mean despite such a term? You might also be thinking that how this term is related to dating, so let us shed some light on the term throwing breadcrumbs in terms of making relationships or dating.
What is the meaning of the term breadcrumbing?
Breadcrumbing when referred to as the aspects of dating, is an action of luring someone or a hinting gesture without interest in committing or getting involved in a romantic relationship. When an individual uses the technique of breadcrumbing, it clearly states that they intend to just lead you by creating a fake impression of being interested in dating you but in reality, they have ulterior motives camouflaged under the complete act.
People try to build false hopes for dating and commitment and create a fake impression of engrossment with some hidden agendas which may also be a sign of red flags. Breadcrumbs can be in the form of flirting, calling, texting, or coy hints. Such people who relinquish the breadcrumbing, are just entering your life on a temporary basis, and just use you as bait to fulfill their purpose.
Breadcrumbing is a toxic technique that involves control and emotional manipulation to just fulfill some ill motive or take advantage of you. It is never done out of love. If a person truly admires you, they would not seek this technique and would approach you using straightforward ways rather than this toxic and twisted way. Usually, breadcrumbing includes the use of social media commonly to lure the victim.
What are Narcissist Breadcrumbs?
Narcissists have a tendency to use people for their needs and desires. They just seek attention and control. They believe the world revolves around them and they are entitled to have whatever they desire. Hypocrisy is their go-to trait. Selfishness is in their true nature, and they would do anything to seek benefit from you. They think they are at the center of the earth and so they are very ignorant, self-centered, and mean. They ought to keep in touch with their exes even and also do not hesitate to lure them into new relationships despite their commitment to their life partner.
Narcissists would not hesitate even once to seek out comfort and intimacy outside of their permanent relationship which is the commitment to their partner when they face hard times or need something from someone. Thus Narcissists are one of the most selfish and hypocritical people you have ever come across in your life.
Narcissists use the breadcrumb tactic to lure the interest of the person whom they want to take advantage from for a temporary basis. They would lure their target using the breadcrumb tactic, by texting them, chasing them through social media, calling, and being in touch to develop a temporary but intimate connection with you. Once their purpose is done with you, you might not even receive any justifications for leaving abruptly.
They use this tactic, not out of love, care, or any positive feeling, but just to keep you in their life a little longer. If you are already a part of a relationship with a narcissist, then they would drop just enough breadcrumbs for you to take as bait. They are never going to change, or have empathy. They just want you to stick around them for a little longer. So do not fall prey to a narcissist, when they suddenly start sending flirty, coy messages as they would just be dropping breadcrumbs for you to be around a little longer.
When you have a narcissist in your life, life becomes more difficult as you would never be able to experience the meaning of true feelings, because all they do is use fabricated lies, fake feelings, and exaggerated situations to keep you interested. They would be the best and worst experiences of your life at the same time as they are champions of using the mirroring technique and becoming what you want them to be at the time. And at the same time, you might be walking on eggshells around them when you have to face their rage and revenge when you oppose them.
What can be the signs of you being breadcrumbed by a narcissist?
- They flee from commitments
- Their feelings are on a temporary basis
- They always stick to flirting rather than asking you out
- Change is just a mere word for them
- Cancels plans at the last minute
- They would keep you intrigued but make you feel bad about that
- Always in the need of physical intimacy
- You would constantly be receiving mixed signals from them
1. They flee from commitments
You know if a narcissist is dropping breadcrumbs, when they constantly talk to you through texts, and calls but refuse to meet up. Or whenever you bring up topics of dating or committing to them they would altogether skip the part. Even if you have been convinced to meet them, they would never provide you with their address, or take you home. They would maintain their safe distance. They would never do anything that can give you a link or provide access to them.
You would not even be aware of their friends, or they would not tell you anything personal. They would be just flirting, sending coy messages, and never have a real conversation with you. They would make small talk when you take the conversation to be seriously involved with you.
2. Their feelings are on a temporary basis
When a narcissist is breadcrumbing it would be like walking on rose petals. They would make it seem like you have found the correct person and they are the best for you. They would be showering you with excessive love and care but often through texts, complimenting you, making you fall for them, and making you feel extremely special.
But once they have your attention, all these feelings and experiences fade away and they are back to their true selves or start showing their true colors.
3. They always stick to flirting rather than asking you out
Breadcrumbing is the step where they grab your attention, attraction, and interest just for a short while unless they keep you intrigued. They would send you flirty messages and make you feel special but all of this just through virtual tools like texting, calling, and face timing. They would decline to meet you by giving some excuse. Breadcrumbing makes you feel like you are on cloud 9. They would make you feel so special and out of the world, that you would think, they would not leave you. They would also call on special occasions but never actually agree to meet up.
All they wish to do is flirt with you, and take advantage of you in the form of physical intimacy but never actually commit to anything serious. They would be all riled up when you ask them to commit.
4. Change is just a mere word for them
They would just display changed behavior like they have become all good and never do anything to hurt you in the future. This is one more tactic of breadcrumbing. Their promises to change are mere words and hollow sentences. They do not change completely. They would still have those toxic traits and they would make shallow, fake, and convincing promises that you would uncover when you get back with them. Narcissists hardly change.
5. Cancels plans at the last minute
You are all set to go out, and then you get a call from a narcissist that they wouldn’t be able to show up due to certain reasons. They would always make plans to meet you but when the time comes to actually meet they would just avoid it by giving some make-believe excuse. When a narcissist is breadcrumbing you, the first thing they do is avoid meeting you and provide you with excuses every time you ask to meet them.
When the narcissist is breadcrumbing you, you would not be able to meet them so easily but they would be keeping you interested through calls and texts. If you are already in a committed relationship with a narcissist, then they would cancel plans at the last moment. They would simply make excuses for many upcoming weeks or months so that you don’t ask them to meet up later too. This is because they do not want to meet you as they do not want to have anything serious with you and just want you to be around for seeking supply and intimacy.
6. They would keep you intrigued but make you feel bad about that
When a narcissist breadcrumbs you, they would sending texts to keep you intrigued. Their texts would be spine-chilling, so you would just wait for their message to appear. While they would be purposely sending late texts just to keep you interested.
When you get all worked up and call them for not replying, they would be angry with you and shoo you away with some excuse stating that they are busy. They would shun you saying you have become needy and desperate while in reality, they have made you so.
7. Always in the need of physical intimacy
When a narcissist just texts, call, or meets for physical intimacy or sex, this is a clear sign f them breadcrumbing you. A Narcissist craves physical intimacy, and when you are the most vulnerable they would insist that upon you. They would not tell you this but they would do everything as you say until they get to lay in bed next to you.
They will play all sorts of love tactics to manipulate you and your thoughts just to keep you as an option for intimacy. It is like a “Friends with benefits” situation. But once they get what they want to achieve, again they would show their true colors. They just call, text, and ask for meeting up for craving and fulfilling their desires. This is clearly a sign of breadcrumbing.
8. You would constantly be receiving mixed signals from them
One moment they would be all lovey-dovey with you and the next minute they are ghosting and gaslighting you when their purpose with you is completed. When a narcissist feels they can no longer take advantage of you or from you, that’s when they start giving mixed signals. They would want you to be still interested in them and would never really care to reach out. When you feel like you are constantly receiving mixed signals from them, take it as a sign of they dropping breadcrumbs your way by them.
Why do narcissists drop breadcrumbs? – Why do they throw it? – Reasons for you being breadcrumbed by a narcissist
- Dropping breadcrumbs makes them feel empowered. They would be sadistically happy as you would just be following their rhythm and they would simply be using you to fulfill their desires without a hint of commitment.
- They just wish to keep you hooked until you realize their sick game, and they have already succeeded in fulfilling their ulterior motive with you.
- They drop breadcrumbs to keep you as their backup option. So they continue ending texts even after you have ended things, just in case they need you.
- A narcissist is always in search of supply, (Supply here refers to giving them attention, praising their accomplishments, providing a sense of entitlement and validation whether it is positive or negative, providing special treatment, and meeting their needs and demands). So a narcissist would be dropping breadcrumbs for you to gain your interest for them to obtain their supply when they run out of supply.
- To revitalize the old, dead, and dropped connection and relive what they have missed with you in the past.
- When a narcissist feels that they have lost interest or you might be thinking of moving forward, they would drop breadcrumbs in the form of love-bombed sweet texts, emojis, comments, or even calls, just to lure you back in. They would have hidden, trustworthy, coy, selfish agendas behind breadcrumbing you.
Narcissists have a tendency to use people for their needs and desires. They just seek attention and control. They believe the world revolves around them and they are entitled to have whatever they desire. Hypocrisy is their go-to trait. Selfishness is in their true nature, and they would do anything to seek benefit from you.
They think they are at the center of the earth and so they are very ignorant, self-centered, and mean. They ought to keep in touch with their exes even and also do not hesitate to lure them into new relationships despite their commitment to their life partner.
This is the reason they use the breadcrumb tactic to lure the interest of the person whom they want to take advantage from for a temporary basis. They would lure their target using the breadcrumb tactic, by texting them, chasing them through social media, calling, and being in touch to develop a temporary but intimate connection with you. Once their purpose is done with you, you might not even receive any justifications for leaving abruptly.
Consider breadcrumbing as your red flag and part ways with them or at least maintain a safe distance from a breadcrumbing narcissist.